Death to Cheating Wives?......Take Two Why do women have to die for infidelity?

 


In the United States, we are insulated from the tragic events that go on in other parts of the world. When we think about sexuality, we often
distinguish the Western world's conflicted puritanical views of sex from the more sex-positive views of Polynesian cultures, France, and the Scandinavian societies.

But recent stories make me appreciate our culture, as conflicted as it is.
In Bangalore, a twenty-eight year-old woman was set afire by her husband, who believed she had been unfaithful. The woman wrapped her flaming arms around her husband in a fiery embrace, setting him afire as well. The husband and wife are both currently in the hospital, both reportedly fighting for their lives.
Also in Bangalore, another cuckolded husband strangled his allegedly unfaithful wife, then called on the assistance of his friend, to cast his wife's body in the path of a train, hoping this would mask his murderous acts.

And, in the sad, continuing saga of Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, the Iranian woman I've p[reviously described, her stoning death is supposedly still to come. She has confessed twice on television, referring to herself as a "sinner." And, the legal and media team who brought her story to the attention of the world, have been chased out of Iran.
There is, sadly, nothing new about this. The history of man is filled with such stories, where women were raped, beaten, strangled, mutilated and cast out of their homes. In the United States, it is believed that the great majority of domestic marital murders involve the spectre of female infidelity. In Ft. Bragg, North Carolina, there was a tragic cluster of murders by soldiers, with the suspicion if infidelity as a motivating force in most of the crimes.

Evolutionary theorists point to these events as evidence of the powerful forces that drive the fear of being cuckolded, and spur the intense desire to protect the male genetic inheritance. But, I think that biology can only play a small role in this story. As long as men, and society, view the sexuality of wives as a commodity, as property, then such tragic displays of jealous rage and anger will continue. When men see the sexuality of their wives as a gift, shared by an independent, powerful and respected individual, to be treasured and cherished, then, we might see the end of such horrifically selfish and petulant acts.

Men struggle with fear and anger over their wives' infidelity. Photo: Examiner.com

I recall in the work The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress, by Robert A. Heinlein, when a male character discusses his options if his wife came home and announced that she had taken a new husband or male lover. He described that he could either move out quietly, or agree with his wife's freedom of choice, and begin working on getting the now-larger family a new home. In Heinlein's polyamorous utopia, men had granted all such power to women, and defended this power with terrible violence. Not against women, but against other men who might attempt to wrest such power from females. A man who attempted to assert violent control over the sexuality of a woman was torn apart by other men.
I don't advocate such violence, in any side of this conflict. But, we must stop viewing the sexuality of a woman as belonging to anybody but her. As long as we see it in any other fashion, women will continue to die.